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The following are taken from actual church signs. "Try our Sundays. They're better than Baskin-Robbins." "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!" "Free trip to heaven. Details Inside!" "Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons - come hear one!" "People are like tea bags; you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are." "God so loved the world that He did not send a committee." "Come in and pray today. Beat the Easter rush!" "Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily." "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Non-smoking?" "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world." "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church." "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns." "In the dark? Follow the Son." "No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace." |